We're pretty sure the 'pocket' aspect of the hot pocket is unnecessary. Testing our theory now.
Don't take this the wrong way but I just mistook a trash can for you
I just heard someone say "gosh-darnit" and they didn't have a southern twang. I worry for New York.
There's a knife in my toilet. And I meant to ask you last night if you got a hair cut?
I actually kinda like her but everyone else hates her, so consider it a third party grudgefuck.
I just saw a fat chick ask the bartender to top her corona off with grenandine cuz she has a "sweet tooth" no that's diabetes fatty
After giving a back rub to someone in the bathroom of the theater, he ripped an "employees must wash hands" sign off the wall to prove that he could and proceeded to hang it up in his house.
Its like no one cares im drunk naked wet and ready to throw myself at some one hold on i found a solution to my problems
I love pie. Pie understands me and the spatula
My mouth taste like pussy and my dad noticed. Hahahaha
Prerry sure I narrowly avoided being tazed by a swat cop last night... But on the up side, we found my purse.
You don't know true terror until you get stuck in a porta potty while frying your face off.
You can't give me tequila around boys who have girlfriends. That ain't new.
I can't even be mad at customs in houstons airport anymore for missing my flight and having to stay overnight. Within an hour of meeting we did it at her place. Her last word being "glad I could show you real southern hospitality". I'm definitely coming back here someday
Dude, some chick came over here earlier and thought my lube was hand sanitizer. She poured it all over her hands.
You'll be pleased to know I just had an elaborate day dream about your penis. you were there too.
Randomize
