I'm half bulimic - I binge but forget to purge
It's official, I've know hooked up with everyone I carpooled with in middle school
I think the best part was when you jumped over me naked.
DIN'T JUSGE NE.
until he told me my vag was like a juicy apple and he loved eating it, yes, i really did think we were both sober.
I mean i can't really be mad...either way i was gonna fuck him or hate fuck him, so it's basically a win/win situation.
i vomited out of my nose in three different houses so far, i will be back for my boots tomorrow
Nothing like an alcohol-fueled, 6-hour-long hunt for weed--complete with occasional breaks for sex.
He's basically me if I was an 8-yr-old boy. It's like looking into a pudgy terrifying mirror
I just held a marble with my kegel muscles for 5 min. You may call me COCKCLAMP 9000!!!!
You know what, don't say anything. You all made fun on me for saying I would fuck him junior year when he taught us algebra and six years later, HERE I AM.
No, it's cool, I just bounced from the hospital. I was...talking to a security guard, maybe?
It's like the cookie assaulted me with being high.
theres a canoe in our lawn. we dont own a canoe.
it was the only safe place
The bar brought brought it upon themselves, they played billy joels piano man before closing, it's not our fault the bar isn't a bar anymore, right?
Randomize
