If you are in NYC and not seeing anyone, you should come fucke me now because:1 i am not in love with you anymore, 2 i am drunk enough where i won't feel the n eed to kisx you awardly to avoid your beard, 3we have unfinished business that i wpn't get -assed unyil orgass have been had, 4 i really really want to
So my graduate coordinator is possible gay man. I may have just found the easiest way to a degree ever.
Good plan b, put your number on all your forms. Hello gamefull employment.
Take that integrity
She threw up all over when she was giving me dome. Not even gonna lie, it felt really good.
Is it bad that I stopped wanting to fuck her as soon as I noticed she had dry skin?
I sometimes completely doubt that you're straight.
I'd like to apologize to your liver. It sees how much beer i drink and gets jealous of how awesome my liver is.
grab my backpack.....its in the fridge
We just saw him running from campus police a few minutes ago. So no, I don't think he's still passed out on the quad.
It's 4PM and I'm finally awake.. I'm covered in dog fur and shame. I'd say it counts as a good night.
i really care about you, respect you, another gay word, and another gay word... lets just drink
I may have made out with a tranny last night, which, if I don't get fired for everything else that happened, really makes last night epic.
Come in your red robin gear. If you smell like French fries we can make love.
Quick question. How did my clothes end up in your room on your bed and I end up outside your room naked on your couch?
Lynn just told me "I heard about your divorce. Condoms or morning pill your choice and I'm buying". Sorry but I got plans now bro.
You are ridiculously similar to a unicorn, and I want to fuck that unicorn.
Sorry you ended up in detox. It's not my fault you decided to walk downtown in only your underwater at 3am. I think the tequila took over.
Randomize
