I just rolled a spliff on a dora the explorer tv tray. Preschool education meet afterschool special.
you went around the entire night in your french maid costume dusting off the "cob webs" on everyone's crotch saying "you havent gotten any action in a while"
I was wondering why i got so many friend requests the next day...
no where in the syllabus does it say "no alcoholic beverages allowed".
He told us that was the only place he could get service when we found him in the closet passed out with a beer
Somehow I managed to make my Dunkin Donuts uniform look slutty. And I'm not even wearing hoops.
he's got a countert top full of yard sale blenders so id say maragita wednesdays is a go.
Just remember that she is a giant dick-sucking forehead and you are better than that.
She said we "made love." I had to explain to her that when both parties agree that the first time time they have sex both people agree to video tape the whole thing its not "making love" but more like random good time fun sex.
She kept throwing quarters at him and yelling "Goooaaallll!!" whilst taking her clothes off one by one. I'd say she had a good night
I am honored my friend, to hold the decision of what enters your body
The porch is breathing.
STAY OUT OF MY SHROOMS YOU CUNT
You grabbed your house keys, threw them at the door and asked, "did it open?"
Come here I'm naked
And I want mozzarella sticks
Congrats on graduating and I'm in a cab and need someone to helps keeping me up, do you mind
That isn't the worst part. It got a bazillion times more awkward when he read me a poem he wrote about his dead cat.
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