David Carradine died? Should I be thinking about this 10 min before my interview?
Haha just ref him when they ask a questin about kung fu which they will since ur Asian
He said he used to draw on the walls with poop when he was a kid.
capt morgan doesn't hurt if you honestly believe it's golden flavored kool-aid.
You kept telling that ginger girl, "it's not your fault, it's not your fault, it's not your fault."
It just hit me that i made out with someone's mom last night
Btw after this weekend the chipndales costume has a 125% success rate.
Just drove past the dude that came in your sock
So I just stole my deans keys to break into the dining hall to get coco puffs. I shouldn't have gone to this meeting stoned.
Life is so difficult sometimes. Can you imagine? Going through life, constantly creating boners everywhere you go.
Not only did my parents pick me up from his hotel room in the morning, but he also came outside and had a casual little chat with my dad through the driver's side windrow.
There's a dude wearing a banana suit at the house across the street....
I just want you to know you're the worst sister ever.
If this is about me and your ex, it's not my fault she doesn't like men.
You know it’s going to be a rough day when you scream “Get fucked” at your alarm clock
I feel asleep with my contacts in, with my arms wrapped around a bottle of vodka. Also... Do we have class today?
God. Spice Girls is now grocery store demographic. Kill me.
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