As long as they suck a good dick I don't care what fruit they have and where they have it
she said if I bought her franzia she would blow me, and she would fuck me if I splurged on martini and rossi. Franzia it is
Just got physical proof that at 6 am i was running around with raw potatoes threatening to mash them on his floor. Hello, Mobile uploads
There's a skateboard on the patio and all the chips are gone. The note on the fridge says 'don't buy cheese'. Stop letting her go outside.
I'm sorry and I love you. One day we're going to live in a whore mansion with our babies and make boys cry.
siamese drinking twins saturday is a go ... bring duct tape.
Don't patronize me, I thought of that on peyote, so it was basically like a message from God.
At least one of us had a weekend full of money and dick
This Alex the guy who suck your belly ring
1. My arms are cement 2. I wish dogs could answer the phone
BTW he text me to text him later after the concert to hang out. Im prepping my bed but I should know I shouldn't count my dicks before they hatch
We had an in depth conversion about the best way to take a dick pic. Both with and without mirrors.
Taylor Swift needs more songs about threesomes. I'm not sure she gets me anymore.
I'm in the kitchen making quiche for my fuck buddy and his wife. I'm probably not the chick to get dating advice from.
I'll start working on my manners when you stop using please and thank you in the bedroom.
Randomize
