I'm sitting at the gyno watching cnn in the waiting room
Everyone is walking funny when they come out, ugh I'm not looking forward to this
She put baby oil on her toes and i am not legally allowed to talk about what happened
You totally left a blue butt print on our banister
Well I think we can all agree that that's better than then bowl of puke I left last time.
She was holding a turtle doing a beer bong out of a flower watering can.
I don't remember anything other than how good it felt when I peed my pants.
boobs and vodka. thats all i can remember, finals week needs to stop ending like this..
I hope the walls stop moving before my manager notices that i'm still drunk.
Hooked up with 8 guys, puked 4 times, got a few bruises, and my face is still numb... I think this visit has truly impacted my college decision
they call him the transporter because he'll be your designated driver in exchange for sufficient weed or sex.\n
what about money
no - he has a code he lives by
You got into a heated argument about Frankenstein's intelligence while double fisting burritos from taco bell.
Pretty sure I just puked up sand. And nothing else.
In 2014 only three boys have seen my boobs so far
I'm crying watching Rihanna at the VMAs. Periods are a bitch
Being home for break is weird, just had a full convo with my dad about what I wanted for dinner, while a dildo was on top of me under my comforter
my gyno just used the expression "dick around." too far?
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