I think we should urban dictionary "drive of shame." It involves a sprint to your car in his underwear and shirt, surreptitiously trying to put on your bra on at stoplights without attracting attention from neighboring cars, and lurking in your car a block from home so you can know when your roommate leaves for work.
Whats the name of the guy with his hand down my pants?
we're making bets on your personal life
and i'm pretty sure he drank the lava lamp
Chicken salad taco, you know, when you're out of bread and crackers, and high.
Man, only now that I'm single is it painfully obvious that I have zero booty calls in waiting. This could be a cold winter
It's a given that you're going to get peed on at a country concert
I'm back here naked if anyones wondering
We told her to calm down. She said "I'm Buddha!". Then army crawled to the cooler for more vodka.
I'm ready to take a few years of my life this weekend
I just took the kind of shit that makes your eyes well up with tears as you feel it moving inside of you... So cleansing.
As your only female friend, I feel the need to inform you that texts like these are why she dumped you.
did you just take a shot to penises and friendship?
I was just going for a one night stand and now I'm at breakfast with his entire family.
Well, if you're anything like me you'll get a lot of ass when you turn 30, so that's a plus
We were looking everywhere for you and I finally found you in the closet talking to a build a bear.. So I gave you and myself another drink
Randomize
