I can only masturbate in one position. It's very inconvenient.
This could be one of the worst things i've done... The background of her phone is her and her boyfriend.
Just rolled over and found your boyfriend in bed with me. Is mine at your house?
How in the hell did I take a shot of whiskey to the eyeball last night?
I just googled if crying burns calories
BOOTY CALL IN EFFECT, BOOTY CALL IN PROCESS, BOOTY CALL ACCEPTED, AND BOOTY CALL INITIATES FRIDAY NIGHT.
i woke up soaking wet with shard of glass imbedded in my flesh dangerously close to my dick what happend?!!
BEER BOTTLE SWORD FIGHTHING!!
Damn you and your marathon penis with its superhuman capabilities
She has no problem going ass to mouth, but won't eat the pizza crust. I don't get it.
Hey babe! Random question. Do you by chance have the pic of my nipples covered with ninja turtles band aids? Thanks.
Okay I'm ready to show you that my weiner still works
Too late, I'm convinced it's broken
I just tripped over a but plug that was on the floor. It's 430 in the morning
I paper cut my nipple reading mail topless
Juice tastes so weird without alcohol
That guy u hooked me up with kept calling me james while were doing it...
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