I find it funny that "sexual harassment" contains the phrase "ass sex". Let me know what your thoughts are on the matter.
It's always a relief to be able to look at some one, and remind yourself that there IS some one who gets laid less then yourself.
I was just given a safe word. It's going it be an interesting night.
lets grab drinks (in a friendly, not super awkward because ive eaten your ass kind of way) sometime soon
wow.
Do you think it would be a good idea to mention in my admissions essay that I was the guy that streaked across the soccer field last year?
I'm trying to spell out I love you with a series of photos of my penis, but I just realized I can't do the Y of you
Woke up in a wet suit with my junk cut out. In a strange apartment. Just found thing biggest bong u have ever seen. WHERE ARE YOU?!?!?!
we came into the house to find you doing shots by your self and when we told you to stop you locked yourself in the bathroom...
did I at least say anything...
you meowed at us and said you're a cat and cats drink for a living
Just saw the ex while I was at CVS at 3am buying Depends for my heavy flow
I knew there was a problem when things got heated and instead of rushing home I offered to get bagels instead
gay sex achievement: unlocked
what
you told me you were going out for groceries!!
i'm pretty sure you can't sue someone for "Taking a shit on my kitchen floor."
All his ex-girlfriends are delicate flowers, tho. And I'm like a trash compactor.
I wouldn't worry about it. You know what they say, THICK THIGHS MAKE THE DICK RISE.
I once took a shot of lighter fluid.. That's not a secret just a fucked up story
I'm giving drunk me full control of my body for the next few days. Please don't let me die.
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