Oh shit, I think we need to get you a hobby that doesn't include penises
Ive had to apologize to every girl i know today because of you
I wanna fuck padma even more now that she's preggers. Is that sick?
Yes but- 100% agreed
the bouncer kept askin you for id just to see how long it would take you to find your pants
My psychiatrist is "consulting" others. I am high-achieving nuts.
he had to fake a sneeze attack to hide the fact he came in 15 seconds?!
so its atleast an 8 for creativity.
Last night you were talking while puking saying, "ahh the shoes and the purse, I'm gonna have to wash those"
Need a travel agent to tell me which countries in Asia have legalized prostitution for New Year. Fireworks would be cool too.
I should start riding the bus again so I can drink all day
Congrats on having the best tasting nipple at the bar last night.
I distinctly remember seeing your nipples from the deck.
It's disgusting. He breathes through his mouth and just sounds fat. Plus he chews all loud and shit.
I DID MY EXPERIMENTING. FOUR YEARS OF IT. IN HIGH SCHOOL.
Got really high to see my fist college experience unfold. Too high to find my classroom but I found the McDonald's down the street
It's almost like he's actually taking my commentary and criticism to heart, but simultaneously succumbing to some primal urge to wear less clothing each time.
Randomize
