Thank God for loud music. There is a circus in my butt right now.
Needless to say Beer Gardens severly frowns upon playing flip cups with real glasses.
i normally make it a rule to leave when white people start rapping... but they had blow.
there's a liquor store near my therapist
i might give it a shot.
It wasn't until like 4 and when we got off the phone you said god was summoning you back into the bar
I am going to wait until he wakes up to set his couch on fire and then pee it out. That way he knows it was not an accident.
I'll just be sleeping in this laundry room. Come get me at bar close.
Ahh good point. I got some interesting mental pics and I'm slowly entering a "fuck it, lets do weird shit" phase sexually, but you may have already figured that out since I've been fucking you sideways and upside down a lot lately.
We're getting paid a considerable amount of money to send each other pictures of our dicks...
Man, I meant to go dancing, but accidentally took mushrooms and just threw the frisbee in the park
Surprise ending
According to my snapchat story, I tore a fake wig off a security guard and ran away with it.
I am watching xfiles and eating microwaved cookiedough, and I see nothing wrong with it.
Apparently I called down to the hotel front desk and begged them to bring us pizza. They brought us tea.
Theres just something about today that says lets get drunk, dont you think?
Shame is for Republicans.
Randomize
