Ok Hollywood, I get it. Megan Fox is hot. Now she is in a movie where she is so hot that dudes just fucking die. Great.
Why am I drunk on a roof painting at 11 in the morning
She introduced herself and then asked "have you ever fucked a girl with a cast?"
better to have posed nude and lost than to never have posed nude at all...thats what i always say
Its name is Richard. And I think he formally introduced us.
chugging beers on the train. people are staring. I would be offended if it wasn't 8:30
You came in as I got off work, ordered us jack and cokes. Put them on my tab, and then proceeded to fall asleep on the bar.
At least one of us had a weekend full of money and dick
Awareness is good for change and all, but ignorance is bliss. I like bliss.
There is not enough whiskey in the world to get me through what happened on Pretty Little Liars tonight.
First world problems.
its gotten to the point where if her hand isn't on my butt i think we're in a fight
I had a dream last night that I used a condom when I had sex. That's how I knew it was a dream
Why are friend nudes not more of a thing? My tits look awesome right now.
I looked into this "it's just lunch" matchmaker thing and it was like 5 grand. If I'm gonna spend five grand I'll throw in another three and get new tits and find my own fucking husband.
Also, my guy said they would be around. And i clarified that when I asked him for mushrooms he didn't hear "a mushroom or two" but rather understood I meant "all the mushrooms you can find between now and 4th of July."
Randomize
