I didnt expect it either. But she was there and I had a boner, so i made it happen.
the homeless guy was waiting for me this morning. this is the closest to a boyfriend ive had in years.
He just helps fat girls get exercise. One walk of shame at a time.
I'm glad you trust me to be your sex stat keeper.
he said i was so drunk that i shared a urinal with him and we simultainiously peed
I woke up with cheeseburger in my mouth and a deep sense of accomplishment.
The waitress just told me I'm asking alot. So far I've asked for a soul, an angel and carbombs
he fell asleep like an hour after we got to the beach, he deserved that penis shaped sunburn.
i'm sad to say... seems like women around here set up their armageddon booty calls ahead of time. wanna fill all these condoms with tequila and head downtown???
that man is just a bundle of powerful magic and poor judgment
I walked by the two of them and mouthed "fuck me" based on there reaction I think they just came in their pants
Never have i felt more judged than when i was throwing up in front of a hello kitty shower curtain at 5 in the morn
It's like sexual waterboarding. You gave me sex so good I'm comparing it to torture. Jesus.
You had to dry your pants with the hand dryer in the bathroom because you "forgot to take it out."
That's crazy. Wow that lady must be fucked up
Yeah I hope she's okay.
I'm still going to fuck her husband but I do hope she's okay.
Randomize