Afterall, it is the real San Francisco treat
What I'm saying is Afghanistan is America's sexually contracted disease.
i really wish i had a remote for my computer. its all the way on my bed while im across the hall puking my brains out to enya. not cool.
Apparently having him hold an open book in front of me while i'm blowing him doesn't count as studying...
yeah, we figured out that passing a joint between cars was a pretty bad idea
I have glow sticks stuck to my boobs and a missed call from the 911. I'd say last night was a success.
omg. i wish i could describe to you the number of things that were just in my vagina. i feel like i got gangbanged by construction workers.
They said I was more of a mess than the German. I have achieved the unachievable, you may bow down to me
You chest bumped everyone we walked by on the way home... Even girls
I'm pretty sure the guy in front of me at Walmart doesn't have good plans. It's one am he is buying a flash light and black bandanna
The name of tonight's festivities is hereby decreed to be the "Honey Boo Boo Hootenanny".
He complimented the perfect handprints you left on each of my ass cheeks.Thanks.
That moment when your mom is so drunk she makes you get out of bed to lay in her bed because she thinks it feels like sleeping on a marshmallow peep....
He is a sex God. It lasted more than an hour, and I don't remember how many times I came. I lost count at 57.
Dude they are making elephants out of dollar bills. I'm way too high for this
Randomize
