just had an encounter with drunk people from out of state at dairy queen. they wanted to stay till march to see the high school play.
There's three frat guys comparing how you were in bed. apparently you have gotten worse with time
If I believed in "responsibility" and "having limits", I would probably say I consumed too much alcohol in the last 48 hours
I'm tired and starving, and I'm pretty sure I just cost the company 33,000 dollars...fuck you and you're "you'll love going to work high" nonsense.
You woke up, laughed, proceeded to throw up on me and then passed out again.
Almost to my house to grab beer. And pants.
this hangover isn't hhappening. im not letting it
its winning. its definitely happening
I just remembered that last night I seriously contemplated swallowing the cap to my toothpaste
I still don't know his name but his ass is spectacular. Like he should never wear pants.
why is there a shopping cart in my back seat? and a dick drawn on the side of my car?
I answered the booty call in my Trophy Wife cutoff and my ex-boyfriends sweatpants with a bottle of jager.
and how was that received?
I'm too pretty to go to jail. Especially in Louisiana.
You kept singing "your gonna lose that girl" to him right in front of her.. of course you got punched in the face.
I just caught my bangs on fire trying to lite a bowl while driving. Thank god it wasn't my eyebrows like last time.
Stereotypically, lax bros last the longest, but have huge egos that are annoying. Baseball players barely last 10mins, but are really nice. And than we have soccer players, last long and have no egos. Me and my friends have collected our findings.
Randomize
