Texts From Last Night · hgdubs's Favorites

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hgdubs's Favorites Texts:

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(941): View more from Florida

thanks for brining me home and putting me in my bed. the pillow fort your built around me is also appreciated.

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(703): View more from Virginia

How can people commit suicide when things like bagels exist

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(480): View more from Arizona

he just tried to convince me that tylenol is a gateway drug

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(215): View more from Pennsylvania

i got kicked out of Barns and Nobles cuz i put all the bibles in the fiction section

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(507): View more from Minnesota

I will one day have loud vengeance sex as my revenge against you. Until then I'm just going to sit in the living room playing John Mayer while you're trying to do it.

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(856): View more from New Jersey

I just farted so loud that my cat got so scared he fell off the couch.

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(267): View more from Pennsylvania

while you were getting the key to the dorm from the lobby i was giving a drunk monolog to the security camera about my life

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(608): View more from Wisconsin

sometimes i think i'm bisexual but then i realize the only girl i'm attracted to is myself.

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