well we can cross tagging a chick in a movie theatre off the list of things to do before we die
why is jon gosselin on the news 24/7 for dating some new lady?? how bout I get on msnbc for not getting laid since forever ago
Call me immediately, my only recent boy news involves me biting a dick.
It was like a secret agent hookup. No names, swift execution, get in- get out.
If there was a game called "keeping your legs shut," I would lose every time.
I ended up staying at a police station for being a witness in a public masturbation case..NOW do you believe me that I've never had a good St. Patrick's Day?
Your beautifulness. Funnyness. Sexy hairness. Coolness. Plus you ask google how far wendys is from your house. Will you marry me
I made out with a guy because he was sitting on my coat...
I have 7 papers to write and I already bought gas station ice cream in my pjs and questioned whether or not a beer float was a thing.
Oohh. Then yes, he is the Alpha Fuckboy.
Is using La Croix as a mixer for vodka a legit way to reach my daily water consumption?
Was it your intent last night to burn the house down? With a waffle..
just found out that my aunt grows weed. today is a good day to be me.
A guy caught me talking to a sock today in the Laundry room if it makes you feel any better
Sadly that does. Why...where you talking to a sock
Bc I didn't know him and I asked him where he came from and why he was hanging out with my thongs
First time not coming to this class high in a month and a half, never again will i put myself thru this torture
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