Send those Picts to my email please. From last night
Ps thx for the porn on my phone
;) ur welcome
then she came back into the room with a neckbrace on. i thought she was getting ready for the pounding of a lifetime.
Every time I hang out with your gay friend, I have to make a checklist of words to look up when I get home. First Google of the night? "Power bottom."
a dead guy is trying to sell me oxy clean on my tv
One little Beyonce reference and he turns on me faster than liberals on Jon Mackey
i got last night's adventure to take the garbage out when he was leaving. my vagina is THAT good.
Ok love is a little strong. But he consented to Nachos, beer and board game date with my cats. Keeper.
Drunk walkin through police station. America
Just once I'd like to throw a party where I don't have to clean up someone else's blood the next morning.
We never did figure out who the stuff on the wall came from, did we?
All I remember is intermittent flashes of being passed out on the side of the road 3 or 4 different times. And telling him to just leave me there and I would walk home in the morning.
sex in a tree stand. check.
you lucky bastard
I'm at a loss. By loss I mean singing songs from Wicked and pretending I'm at the Oscars
It's a sad night when one of your friend texts you that she's going on a date with someone you know and then invites you to maybe have a drink after
Like I fucked him in the shower at 3 am when I had classes all day the next day so he can't say I'm not dedicated
I HAVE A STRAIGHT LINE ACROSS MY ASS ABOUT THE WIDTH OF A SLIM JIM. ERICA!
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