so, on facebook you can become a fan of butt sex, and also premarital sex, but not premarital butt sex, which is what I was aiming for.
I found her sitting in the shower having an argument with the dolphins on the shower curtain.
I just saw the list where the U.S. doesn't even rank in the top 10 in drinking countries. I know its Tuesday but....its for America
double majoring has taught me only that psych majors are sluttier than govt majors
The last thing I remembered was laying in the bathtub fully clothed with the shower running while he was picking grilled cheese out of my hair. I couldn't figure out if i was more upset about being soaking wet or the fact that my grilled cheese was in my hair instead of my mouth.
It's like you are the superhero of getting jizzed on
Oh, I'm just lighting tennis balls and WD-40 on fire, what are YOUUU doing?!
Woke up in an unfamiliar pair of underwear, running shoes but no socks, and a cowboy hat. Thank you crown royal
Her mom walked into the garage as we were smoking a kush blunt with sombreros on.
I think it's safe to say I'm rolling my hypothetical balls off
What I do when I'm blackout drunk is none of my business.
idk i was trying to watch Fuller House and you got up out of a dead sleep, just in your boxers, said "no more Dave Coulier" and walked out to the living room and unplugged the router
He also needs to focus on not being such a little bitch, but that's none of my business.
I'll give you a blowjob in a Santa hat if it will put you in the Christmas spirit
Sooooo have your ex-girl console you over your ex ex girl that you destroyed said ex-girl over the possibility of
Randomize
