Ive had to apologize to every girl i know today because of you
We fucked standing up with my right leg over his shoulder. Thank you mom and dad for having once enrolled me in gymnastics. It has finally paid off
They had a "who can aim further away from the toilet" contest. I'm now washing piss off my ceiling.
He moved away. I mourned his dick all of Sunday. I feel a little better now.
does pizza still have the 5 second rule in the bubble bath?
He tipped the stripper with quarters. After that not even the waitress would talk to us. I had to move to another table to get a lapdance
judging by my wet hair I would guess I showered at the bartenders apt last night?
There's a fried egg and an empty bottle of reddiwhip in the parking lot. Did you have fun last night?
He was having Sex and you yelled 'hot and dangerous!" and he responded with "if you're one of us then roll with us!" when he went to he bathroom I saw her getting dressed, looking mortified.
I feel like my dick pic collection should be archived at the Smithsonian
time to play the game of how much Christmas shopping I can get done before these shrooms kick in
He yelled "I'm Bruce Springsteen!" when he came. This is why I don't sleep with guys from Jersey.
honestly, you deserve someone taller anyways
Omg I got up from his bed and almost did a header into the wall because I came so many times I forgot how to walk.
THEY WILL NOT STOP FLINGING CARDS AROUND THE ROOM! It has been four hours. HOW CAN IT STILL BE ENTERTAINING?!?! I will be under the table if you need me.
Randomize
