By the way the awkward moment from yesterday is now a bad situation I have to figure out.
Thank you Grey Goose.
I'm at the airport and there's a guy wearing all camoflash to go hunting .. Should I bump in to him and say woahh sorry didn't see you there?
Our professor just said "No class today, go get stoned." A guy seriously walked over and hugged him.
We had sex on a ferris wheel in canada, our relationship will never be the same
You should ask if we are margaritasing tomorrow. and yes i did just turn that into a verb
Preparing for thanksgiving at home now by chugging bourbon. Less than a month to train!
I just don't understand how a line to ride a camel on a college campus could be too long for you to wait in.
He broke into my apartment to check his Facebook again, the beer is all gone, and there's a new high score on pac man.
No, the real question is if you drink like I drink why WOULDN'T you wear a cape.
Do you hit a new low in life when you have to carry around a puke bag in your purse when you're hungover?
I get so many dick pics from him...He has an unhealthy obsession with his own penis...
If your gig isn't over in 30 minutes I am coming on that stage to come on your dick.
do you ever look at a card in your wallet and reminisce about all of the drugs youve done with it?
He seems like a nice guy. I mean, I know he's married and he's essentially paying me to be his side hoe, but he really seems like a good person.
Drunk version of me is like a sleeping demon inside of me that awakes to the sound of vodka
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