you kept eating the heads off the gummy bears and screaming 'euthanized!'
Just made gatorade. in the bathtub.
a search helicopter?!
I'm sick of being broke. I had vicodin and frosting for lunch.
some drunk guy just paid $3 for each cig that i picked up off the ground. the cigs that he threw on the ground. I might just follow him the rest of the night
Watching water boil has never been so amazing. I love wake-and-bakes.
Not rlly sure. Might just drink and sleep. Gotta wake up for my last rabies shot lol
yea. Don't mess. He will heal me. But my blowjobs will be historical.
how are things with the new girl?
good, we have nothing in common but she likes being choked
True idk how my parents didn't know I was blackout. I ate like 4 pieces of cheesecake and showed my cousins my boobs
But we only had three ninja turtles. So everyone that would ask us where Donatello was, we would say "what? He's gone? Shredder is at it again!"
I almost don't wanna have sex with her because I'm afraid she'll steal my hat
I walked outside and found some random guy passed out on our front porch. We managed to acquire the 12 pack of lagers he had so it's all good.
He put a doughnut around his dick and I ate it. What can I say. It was a good fucking night.
Drinks have officially taken priority over self-respect, and I'm not even all that torn up about it.
Randomize
