Dating is not our generation's strong point. We're an era that's good at getting laid.
the only reason I knew his name is because half way through I looked up and it was tatooed on his chest.
We need to either start getting drunk more often or one of us need to start doin drugs
Wtf? Why?
I want awesome conversations to show the world.
There is a keg full of gin. THERE SHOULD NEVER EVER BE A KEG FULL OF GIN.
i love waking up at 5am with an imprint of a toilet seat on my chest
I don't know how many crown and cokes he went through but I know it was more that I have fingers. We are never leaving Texas.
Got free coffee because I told the guy at starbucks the pleats in his khaki pants made his cock look big.
My lab manual has instructions for making home wine. Room project?
I've discovered that regular handcuff keys, sadly, do not work on real police handcuffs.
I need a burrito and a hug.
It's not that he's ugly its just that being blind folded makes everything less awkward
I can't wet the bed. That was the old me. I'm grown
Oh my god
I asked if he wanted to sext and he just started sending me pictures of his beard.
Would it be totally inappropriate to have his frat and our sorority Teebowing our exit from the abortion clinic?
He's gonna be like you slept with too many of my friends and you're being voted off the island haha
Randomize
