And no, shaving doesn't make it look bigger, either
at FSU your more likely to get an STD than a parking spot
I'm sending you this that that when you wake up and see the girl sleeping next to you, you know who to thank
you just used a box of cheese-its to get into the bar
It's going to be great. We're a perfect team to break up marriages and happiness.
I've developed breathing exercises to keep myself from puking..
I tried to take a photo for proof but couldn't hold my penis, camera, and measuring tape all at the same time.
French fry pizza
Are you brilliant or just really high?
Can't it be both?
He puked on the grill while the burgers were on. We had to go to taco bell
I just feel like you're using me for sex.
I'm glad you finally understand the context of our relationship
Was it fun? The night started with home made Jager and ended in him falling out of a tree with a pocket full of house numbers...you tell me.
Just took adderall with about half a bottle of red wine...i have stopped trying for this last exam
I just set my messenger to Away so I could run downstairs to masturbate. Working from home is the BEST
My loniness meter has reached its peak. I just played shadow puppets using my Big Mac on the wall with my cats
Certain restrictions may apply. Common side effects of sex with me include unbridled joy, a healthy glow, soreness and the inability to walk for short to long amounts of time. If any of these side effects occur please consult your physician, so he/she can prescribe me a "high-five".
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