Get out of your relationship and into my pants.
so not only am i rooming with two chicks on the volleyball team, but we just put down the deposit on a hot tub. this is going to be the best summer ever for my dick.
dude wearing that thong all day was not worth the 7 bucks
Trying to figure out when's a good time to take acid and not tell anyone and see how long it takes people to notice
you seemed to enjoy falling down hill
wow, never heard the last few months of my life put so succint
At what point lastnight did a lens fall out of my glasses and nobody tell me?
I feel like my nipples were chewed on by alligators.
No you don't understand. This tree is really alive. Like in Pocahontas.
No kiss but I got free McDonald's so at least we can focus on what is really important here
I have no concept of chastity or moderation, she is a Catholic guilt poster child, how could I not try to hit that
And you are going to be so turned on by my batman skills later
Don't be hating on my everclear. Never taken a smoother journey into intoxication.
I CAN SPEAK THE LANGUAGE OF THE ANIMES.
YOU SHOULD HAVE BEEN THE FIRST VISITOR TO CHRISTMASLAND
My new superpower is making fuckboys disappear!
Bending dicks and egos since 2002
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