i know we just met, but i forget your name, and i'm wondering why my penis burns?
i realized i had a pad on before i went to this guys house so i stuck it in his neighbors shrub.
I just got a new temperpedic mattress pad and started smoking weed again in the same week. finding motivation to go to a 9:AM class is close to impossible.
How did a couple beers and monopoly turn into a bottle of vodka and throwing eggs at eachother in the kitchen?
Was rudely woken up by strangers at 4:15am. I was leaning against the stoplight at 9th
he's measuring my pool to see how much jello powder he needs. He got paid today.
Our new goal for this summer is to fuck so hard we lose his security deposit.
Who are these men, what are we doing here, how is this helping us toward our goals of sex and pasta? Things to consider.
I can't remember if I puked before or after the shots of absinthe. Or why I thought shots of absinthe was a good idea.
It's simple. He fucks me at his place and I fuck him at my place. It's like man of the house gets to top.
Sorry it's taking so long, it's harder to take an ass pic with an iPad than you think
purchased gas station taquitos and condoms at 4 this morning. It has been magical..
I'm drunk still and I cried and now I'm watching Whitney Houston singing the national anthem and I'm crying more
I was told I look like trouble once and that was by a fireman at the sex show. I was carrying two beers and a penis pinata.
Been using bowl smoking as a method of time for so long I don't know how long it actually takes to get to work
Randomize