Before I dignify that with an answer, let me get this straight. You're asking me if I wiped my ass on the towels?
I just horrified a large group of people. Congrats on dating me.
also i think i should join the bone marrow registration when im sober
we were hooking up and then he goes "you can touch my penis" and i laughed too hard to do anything. no second date.
on a brighter note, the cop thought i could kick adams ass if it came down to that and said he had $20 on me if it ever happens
Did u smell a guys dreadlocks in the McDonald's drive thru line last night or did I dream that?
That guy has been pretty randomly in and out of my vagina for 4 years...I don't think I'm required to tell him when I'm dating.
Good point.
Oh yeah I remember when I first saw Kyler's balls. If there's anything high school swim prepared me for, it's the amount of testicles I would see here
What I've learned from glowsticks: glowing things are not safe to eat
girl pulled up to the stop sign, got out, threw up all over my hood said happy thanksgiving then drove off
I wish I could take a screenshot of how things literally look from my eyeballs right now
If you can't have hot, loud sex in a dorm for the last time ever, what can you do in this world?
You know that voice that tells you to do something spontaneous after 1am? Don't listen to it.
There's a possibility I may have hooked up with that British guy...
Possibility? You left the door open! Everyone saw!
Do you remember coming over and asking for toast and then singing that yeah toast song very loudly while you were dropping my bread all over my kitchen?
Randomize
