Grow some girl-balls and come out already
I don't know what you're doing, but there's a dragon on my street.
She asked me why I was wearing a Batman Suit. Have I ever needed a reason to wear a Batman Suit?
once you have herpes you dont really care what goes in your mouth anymore.
She's echoing.. Her head must be in the toilet..
One of my friends took me out last night for a bday celebration and I just now remembered that a man blew fire balls across the bar in honor of my birthday... How drunk do you have to be to forget that?
Before we fucked we both mutually agreed not to tweet about it.
Not sure if you're still doing the whole "sleeping with only one person" thing but if you're not we should sleep together when I get back in town tonight.
I can get there in 20, one question, Drress Code? Stripper Lite (make up may require an additional 5-10 minutes), Suggestive Professor (professor Kamil's cleavage ain't got nothing on me), Daywear, Dyke (and trust me you ain't seen dyke), or Exactly What I'm Wearing Right Now. (all of the above may arrive under a coat and are subject to my level of sobriety. Which is currently like nonexistent).--xoxo you know you love me, Gossip Girl.
I was on all fours trying to empty the bowl we smoked into the sewer when your neighbor came out, but besides that it went smoothly
I told him I wish we were at my house cause then I could tell him to get out after we had sex.
Her tramp stamp said call me maybe. You should have run for the nearest decontamination shower immediately.
Can't really tell your Mom you are moody due to dick deprivation.
i just want to get drunk and cry and have sex with lots of men
I'm so gassy and it's your fault.
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