whats a more ladylike way to say "fuck me on your lunch break"?
How long do you need to date somebody until it is acceptable to fart in their presence?
The real question is how long do you need to date them to dutch oven them?
In America we eat man semen.
Let me guess--your parents are cousins.
he literally had a slideshow of all the girls hes had sex with pictures set to american woman
He brought Stephanie home from the black light party. Apparently he has night vision beer goggles
She was really fucking loud. My neighbors definetly knew my name...
Either I put my underwear on inside out and wore it like that all day, or I had sex with him. Its sad I have to guess.
Can I color on your dick again?
Exactly best part of my night he took of his shirt and surprise traveler fanny pack
Nothing says "back to school" like walking in the first day with a hangover
It's like the cookie assaulted me with being high.
last night we watched this really loud chick try and pick up this smoking french guy who's english was sooo bad. she finally pointed at her beer and then her vagine
gross
like you've never done an interperative dance for sex, please
Flight got cancelled. Stayed in the same hotel as the flight crew so now I can cross Sex with Pilot off the bucket list
He regularly flies into DC, so I’m going to sign him up for my Frequent Flyer program!
I need to take my iPad to the Apple store (when this is all over). Do I need to delete all my dick pics/videos or are they used to stumbling across that sort of thing?
Randomize
