Police were just in my backyard to recover a loaded .38. What the fuck?????
I just heard these 2 kids from flint and Detroit arguing over whose economy is worse... It's really sad what passes for competition in Michigan these days
so i told him i still liked him. he laughed
well, your crazy. what did you expect?
Probably, but last night was a special kind of drunk. It was a "let's see how drunk I can get without killing myself" drunk.
so, are you laying bloody on campus somewhere or did you go out after class and forget to let me know?
bloody. ill be home soon.
Its 11am, im in the city in a pocahontas outfit, lost a heel and found a gold rolex in my lingerie.
We fucked in my basement while hiding from the cops.. And now his Facebook picture is him and others holding up there MIP's in front of my house.. I feel obligated to add him as a friend.
I shouldn't have to say "get your balls off my counter" on a Wednesday.
We got the possum out of our house. We built a maze with our empty kegs and chased it with brooms.
Don't I can pass these orgasm blushes off as sunburn for much longer...
Some guy Just sang about my ass on the street
It was terrible lyrics but I would have thrown my life savings into that guitar case if I had any.
You should know two things about me,,,1) I am highly sexual and 2) I am HIGHLY competitive so you telling me about how much sex you had with the other girl makes me say "challenge accepted"... you should hydrate.
Which emoticons convey sympathy for sleeping with someones bf ??
Like either my tits got bigger or I've succumbed to Trumps tiny hand syndrome
My mom found my empty case that I hid in my room and just said "now why don't you be a responsible underaged drinker and throw it in the recycling" and walked away. I'm in shock.
Randomize
