i would rim the shit out of meg ryan
I just spent my lunch hour driving around campus yelling "TRADE LIVES WITH ME!" to all the freshmen moving in
I dont think punching her boob is the type of reverse psychology that will get her to blow you.
Dude, smoked out of a pumpkin tonight. I like Halloween more now
He said to me this morning that we should finish these beers, go and get plan B then on the way back, go to the pub to celebrate the death of our baby. I love Manchester.
how do you feel about lunch break shots ?
begin the sex magic rocket ship countdown
Her dog trainer Fuck buddy is over here again. She sounds like a squeaky toy and he talks to her like he talks to the dog. I CAN HEAR EVERYTHING!!!
I got a 5/5 with my "I don't want a baby" rant essay. She said my use of the word "leeches" was a powerful metaphor :)
You informed me your place was now a nudist colony and unless I was there to drink schnapps with the cat I had to strip.
WHY HAVE SO MANY THING GONE IN MY BUTT ON THIS TRIP
It's just a friend who is recently single and I'm going to heal his broken heart with my vagina
I'm a little concerned about right now. You showed up at my house soaking wet, drunk with a bag of ham and 2 liter of Dr. Pepper, and you refused to tell me where you got the ham until I gave you some more liquor.
Omg I joined a choir last night...
According to my bank account I spent a penny some where
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