Fuck U Mike is a golden god.
Mike give steph back her phone.
And i was thinking, 'i'm happy to be underneath you, but i wish you weren't doing THAT.'
I have discovered something important. The trick to making food taste better is not always 'more hot sauce'.
she said and I quote "NO SOUP FOR YOU!!!" and closed her legs.
my mom was in labor with me for 32 hours, it's only fair to start drinking now.
Gonna bang his former student. Clearly I am winning this breakup.
I am expending an amazing amount of energy to not throw up right now
All I know is....there's beer in my camera. How do I know? Because I can pick up my camera,shake it and HEAR, the beer in it
Don't. You get on the 18 year old. I'll get on the 38 year old. Together we will bridge 2 decades of cock.
My vagina was just really confused why you weren't inside it
The fact that he offered to stop once he stuck it in my ass was sadly the most considerate thing anybody's ever done for me.
Moral of the story: fuckboys never change
Maybe whip a sausage around while you do it and pour some beer on you. Like a German white snake video
I think I may have fully transcended this spectrum of life. I can see beams of light man. Down to the photons
What
The only downside is I can't stop skipping
Hi darlin, what are you doing tonight?
.... Things I will not be proud of
Randomize
