Confirm your location. A cross street is best, but if google mapping yourself is your least-shameful option go for it. ps- going through his mail for an actual address is always an option.
Something in my vomit makes me think I shouldn't have had that slurpee
Apparently I ran up to the group of cookie-cutter blonde chicks and screamed "Delta Gamma Nuuuuuuu!" really excitedly and tried to hug them and share fake sorority stories with them.
started to yawn and threw up hamburger helper instead. awesome night.
she's using motion activated glade air fresheners as some sort of early warning system
You told them to let you give him stitches claiming you were a certified nurse because you've taken plant biology classes
I'm truly not mad that he's at a strip club, it's that he couldn't look far enough into the future to figure out how to get himself home from one
In other news, I just burned my penis
I have visions of guys in cheetah costumes with suits over it pissing on a children how are you
He pulled over in the Compass Bank parking lot so I could dry-heave, but I decided I couldn't vomit there because "I bank here."
"my nose is broken but I'm beer pong champ so it evens out really"
We got drunk, we had raw sex and we discussed about the showrunner change in Doctor Who, in that order.
just blew him in the library. I am a classy dame
Also I know now I was meant to be a comedian. Had both arresting officers laughing.
When the paramedic asked Logan how he fell he explained that he was trying to lick his eyeball, missed and tripped over his own tongue.
Randomize
