Black lace...the rest is up to ur imagination
I just put a picture of what I imagine Rob's dick looks like on it on my vision board. thank you Oprah!
Does she know that uploading nude photos to photobucket and networking are two different things? You may want to ask.
I knew I was in the wrong bar when "I have a daughter your age" was some random's pick up line.
She was trying to fuck the exchange student from France. His English is really bad and the music was loud so she just pointed to a beer bottle and then her vagina.
I am now the only person in my apartment who hasn't had sex in my bed.
She was moaning so loud as i walked out of the room her roommates gave me a standing ovation... i think they are next
I've actually, minus lsat night have actually changed my drinking habits
I'm like a savant for remembering names I learned while I was drunk. Seriously, I'm three for three. I'm on a roll.
I recently had a rabies scare because I thought putting socks on my hands to pick up a squirrel that got in my house was a good idea.
My plan for the weekend: 1) Get shit faced in Vegas. 2) Not die
I remember eating bacon bits off your chest that night... I'll never look at bacon pizza the same way
I did wake up to a random meat and cheese plate next to my bed, that was a thrill.
sober me thinks like you do. drunk me needs sober me's advice. am i allowed to go to his house?
Got a blowjob while watching James Bond's "Octopussy." My 13 year old self would be so proud
Randomize
