but i got with him after midnight so its technically 2 days
tonight i'm making a christmas tree shaped shot pyramid
You're going to have to tell him your name isn't Ivor McTruckson eventually.
My glasses are somewhere in your living room. Also, my underwear might be in your bathroom or on or around your porch. Sorry.
Just had a random flashback of you tickling some guy's nipple with your claw ring, and then him moaning and stripping in the middle of the bar. You give good memories.
I told him I had to grab my Swedish fish from the car before they froze. Then I just left. But the fact that he knew how important it was not to have my fish freeze almost made me come back in....almost.
We got the DJ into it too! "If there are any dudes into other dudes out there, my man mark is looking to get pounded. Buy him a drink stat!"
Besides you're a Tennessee fan and it'd be against my religion to have your penis inside me today.
I just put Gatorade in my wine, cause electrolytes, you know.
The only thing about him that I appreciated was that he destroyed the bathroom at your birthday and missed singing to you. And we all knew.
GIIIIRL I AM STONED AF AND I HAVE A HOMEMADE POT PIE IN THE OVEN THIS PARTY IS LIT.
Good morning! Spongebob is on channel 257 when you wake up. Help yourself to breakfast. You were great last night. See you when I get back.
You sat outside petting a picture of your cat for hours... not even the real thing... just a picture.
Note to self: dont wear a butt plug for several hours and then go gym and try and do squats
I knew the bike rally would be fun when I saw "male pole dancing" on the schedule
Randomize
