i just got arrested. apparently dont move means dont move.
he just quoted gucci mane to try and get me to give him head.
season finale of lost and an oz of weed. tonight my mind is going to be blown.
the worst part is we had a camera rolling
Did his mom notice it when she saw u guys?
Yes.
I have to watch that.
As I climbed in the bathroom window from the room I noticed both him rommates staring and talking about me in the hall...
She made a roadhead CD. Can I marry her?
On another note, why did I wake up wrapped in bubble wrap. I can only assume it was for my own safety
I think you were giving a sex seminar on your kitchen table last night.
You declared war on your ex and then had sex with who you thought was her sister. No one knows who she was but we think your dick might be in danger.
Random Survey Question: If things start getting serious with this cop, do I have to stop doing coke?
well my grandpa saw your dick pic, so why don't you tell me how my day is going
Plus who wants to live somewhere tom jerked off? No one.
I know. His dick was small at the top and got bigger at the bottom, like a fucking curling wand.
its Niagara falls. its like international waters. You can get away with anything there
Just so we're clear, drunk and naked is not appropriate attire for Thanksgiving. Do it this year and Grandma will ban you for life.
Randomize
