I made out with four boys last night, AND EXCUSE ME WHILE I COUNT HOW MANY GIRLS.
I wishh there was a lost and high section in walmart cause I would be there right now
Your therapist is not going to think that you using your vagina as revenge is okay
my greatest accomplishment from the city of diplomacy is that i puked at a table of 5 diplomats and my professor and NONE OF THEM NOTICED
Well the police had to intervene and I couldn't exactly feel my legs by the end of the night, but I'd say it was a successful Friday night.
Well. It was around 3 or 4 in the morning. He ran into the woods. Wearing moccasins. Holding an extension cord. He was trying to catch a deer. That about sums up the awesomeness of the night.
Does Jesus have blonde highlights? Pretty sure I saw him in a lavender shirt and Sperry's.
There arew tilmes ina man's life when christmaas. THerew are times in a man's lfie when drunk texts from a bathrom hyufgirto. So, you know, merry chriastmans.
I literally just want someone to fuck me and buy me cheeseburgers. I don't even want a relationship at this point. Just a chew toy and some food.
I'm using emojis for drug deals now. It's time to kill me.
While we were doing it he looked up at me and said "Does your husband fuck you this good?" Talk about a mood killer....
I have nice boobs. Don't wanna deprive anyone of the experience.
You're a saint.
So her ex boyfriend came up a lot in conversation while I was fucking her. Is that weird?
Who the fuck has a conversation during sex?
Aww you are cute. With your penis. And failures.
i came so much i feel like i were to try again, only dust would come out. and maybe glitter
Randomize
