thx for the lesson on dirrty dancing
At least make sure they are 18
Why
I really liked your hair last night but that style makes it really hard to hold it while you puke
She told me a very interesting story, complete with pantomimes, about how she got a habanero seed in her vag
How do you politely bring up someone's criminal record?
You brought back some girl with you at 3am and introduced her to everyone as "hot pocket"
We need to stop sleeping with people based on which NFL team they like.
get over here now. the boys are doing shots of everclear, chasing with monster, and some dude jsut walked in with a backpack full of tattoo gear.
... They left for 10 minutes and came back with a lobster he's in the toilet downstairs
You grinded on me in Jimmy johns to a madonna song.
he's had a change of heart. and besides, we could use a laugh.
oh, well, if you all need a good laugh, by all means endanger my life.
Woke up eating a pickle on the bathroom floor this morning in some random guys sweat pants.
Jamie's fucking a senior citizen and I'm eating chips and salsa in the shower at 2am, so whatever you're doing it can't be worse.
woke up on my floor using my jeans i wore out as a pillow
haha i wouldn't expect any less of you
All I know is when I asked you how many fingers I was holding up, you said "Hippo"
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