she was hot for a redneck and i dont look at teeth
I fear hooking up with people who have white pillowcases because my guyliner always smears on it and i either have to A. sneak out in the night or B. wash it and see them again
S and I had anal without a condom because I'm on my rag but he didn't finish. Should I still take Plan B?
We may have a problem that even dr. phil cant solve
Dude with the Beatles haircut just got his pilots license and wants to take us up to do a case race mid flight. Don't tell me networking is unnecessary.
Given my current decline of critical thinking and capacity for speech it's probably best u call the cops
thanks so much for stopping me from telling him i want to have sex with him while i proceeded to hookup with the air.
If you fuck her, Im going to call you and I want you to cough 2 times.
I left after my shirt got dropped in the toilet thinking that there was absolutely no good that could happen the rest of the evening. I hear I was very wrong.
Blacked out last night, but left myself a note that said "oops on oops on oops" that can never be a positive
I though us hooking up in the field was your way of saying you were an outdoors person
you passed out while setting up your phones timer to time how long it would take before you to passed out.
So the woman who sold us weed at the park is pregnant. With another small child. And the basket she used to carry the joints is decorated with Barney stickers.
She's like a yuppie Nancy Botwin. She just gets better and better.
There's a super pregnant woman here complaining about back pain. I better not see a live birth in the hair care aisle
Did I tell you I’m going on a date? His name is Michael and we both like dinosaurs and anal.
Randomize
