I just peed or puked all or around my parjibgb lot.
parking. I am not drunk
dude i dnt kno how, but i think theres a tampon in my butt
he sent her a picture of his penis to show that he "trusts her" or some shit like that..well she showed it to me, and let me just tell you..it looked like a freaking slug or something. creepiest penis i've ever seen. hands down
yea pretty sure we followed the trail of your spaghetti-o vomit to find the car
my mom just asked me what a queef is. she needs to stop watching south park
I'm drunk enough to talk Barbara Walters outta her panties
should my penis look like a turkey
I was just informed that you are the reason for my 2 missing front teeth.
He was sleeping, but the way he was made him look like an adorable, fuzzy penis
Yeah he got kind of mad when he found out he had chased his last two shots with a combination of orange soda, water, and used mouth wash.
No, no. The rest of his everything inspires me to put his dick in my mouth
Oh boom. You're officially Dr Phil. I need to have sex that I actually remember participating in.
we all thought you were asleep. he found you an hour later sitting outside in the snow lighting a bowl, singing the CatDog theme song, and hugging a box a Franzia.
If there's anything my liberal arts education has taught me, it's belligerence.
Turns out your granddad is cooler than you. We're taking him on our New year's eve pub crawl instead. Sorry.
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