Bitch is talking to much, howd u ever get her 2 shut up?
It's worth it.
How worth it?
Back door worth it
Crying babies in a bar. Really?
And she just changed the baby's diaper on the table. It's killing the beer garden.
Yea. But u kept saying "as long as she doesn't have aids" so I was concerned
After skinny dipping in your pond, I think me and tequila have added a whole new dynamic to our relationship.
He was streaking. We were hammered. We had roman candles. It only made sense to shoot them at him.
but he gave me mouthwash after the bj. no ones ever done that for me before.
Fuck. I'm going to pass the savings right on to the strippers. It's trickle down economics.
I just wanna go somewhere and not be judged for wearing spandex shorts that make my ass look like a slice of fucking heaven. Is that so much to ask??
Just for future reference, me asking if you're free, followed by a winking face is not my way of suggesting a tandem bike ride.
I don't give a shit if she's homeless, if you're gunna live outside el pollo loco and act like a bitch I'm squirting you with my water bottle
Jailed a totally belligerent hot guy. That was probably my most thorough pat down. Ever.
Thirty seconds is a long time in jizz time...
she is legit trying to fuck me to death between her and work i haven't slept in 3 days and have at least 16 hours to go before sleep is a possibility. can i crash at your place she doesnt know where you live
I think I should've done my makeup before I took the acid. Because now I just feel silly looking at myself in the mirror
so i was about to call you for your birthday but then i started making out with this guy... and i feel bad but i felt like you'd understand
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