Omg Kevin Jonas is engaged!!!!!!
Omg really? To who. Gay marriage is only legal in like 3 states.
"Worlds Wildest Videos" should be called "Crazy White People"
you know he's having a sex change. I can't believe you called him "titty man" to his face....
i take my contacts out every time we fuck so i cant see all the stretch marks
He told me the color of his piss. Worst. First date. Ever.
I WILL NOURISH YOU WITH SOUP AND PENIS!!!!!! And a sandwich of your choosing.......you like turkey?
i officially have over $300 in my bank account. that's a year's worth of chipotle.
Get drunk. Masturbate to his picture. Fall asleep. Repeat. Fuck summer.
I didn't think it was possible but he dislocated his thumb during intercourse last night then cried
I stole a tiki torch last night and just returned it. Things have been better.
Because cocaine and lesbian hookups on a Tuesday cannot be the new normal
Thought for a game. Duck, Duck, Grey Goose. If you're tapped, you take a shot. Then proceed as normal.
Just woke up with only a scarf and my uggs on. i hate partying naked in winter.
Wait, like drink with real Phil. Or Phil, the cat that sometimes lived in your closet in Myrtle Beach?
Best news I’ve heard all day. Cookies and dick. What more could a girl ask for?
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