it's a girl!!
That's great, I look forward to meeting her in 18 years
He just came in my nostril. Never look down when a guy is pulling out during missionary.
Stripperoke is exactly what it sounds...
He said he had a problem he needed to take care of before we got omelets and then showed me his erection.
the wall and i were having dominance issues.
I puked in a solo cup and then offered it to him. So yeah, it was a rough night.
Like, what's the customary waiting period to hookup with your newly single ex that you never stopped hooking up with?
Why are you awake at 6am and liking photos from rando Russian chicks on Instagram?
Fucking that physical therapist guy was the best decision I ever made.
you know it's been too long when the heat of a pizza box on your lap turns you on.
I just took the batteries out of the xbox remote so she could replace the dead ones in her vibrator If that's not love I don't know what is
I've entered the world of uncircumcised penises. It's disgusting.
I'm going to need to invest in some knee pads if I keep having nights like tonight
Would it defeat the purpose of a run if I ran to McDonalds?
let your parents know i'm sorry i ran around the house pretending their metal detector was a "booze detector"
Randomize
