the mandatory saturday morning class for those written up by RA's turned into a gold mine...just met EVERY hot chick that parties.
there has got to be a maximum amount of semen a person can take in before they get some kind of poisoning.
We were eating hotdog buns dipped in French onion dip in lawn chairs at 4am. That drunk
I went down on her for 35 minutes and didn't even get a handy. I've never felt more desire to be gay in my life.
soo...what's the appropriate way to ask to come over and take your S&M lingerie out of your ex's apartment? big weekend planned, kinda need it.
It would be like if I said I had the cure for cancer and my explanation was I like turtles.
Is it bad I'm drunk at orientation
You've been there for 12 hours, what are you supposed to be doing
Not be drunk
Nothing says happy valentines day like waking up to a naked man you hooked up with taking a walk of shame
She ordered an O'douls. That was the end of that date
Getting dome in the backseat of a friends car with Ariana Grande playing in the background was probably the most romantic part of my night
Dude chill patience is a virtue.
WHY DOES PATIENCE HAVE TO BE A VIRTUE, WHY CAN'T HURRY THE FUCK UP BE A VIRTUE?
Two of us got arrested. Gonna be delayed a bit. Save me a burger.
Dude this weed has me so paranoid.
Yeah tell me about it I just screamed after I coughed because my own cough scared me.
no i'm going to the dr today, he fucking banshee-shrieked in my ear as he was coming and now i can't hear out of it
He thought reverse cowgirl meant he dressed up as a cowgirl. Honestly, it was more creepy than funny
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