I accidentally had phone sex last night
I just took a girl with a hip brace and crutches on a date. she obviously can't bone. is it rude to demand a blowjob?
suntimes in life you find a rare opportunity, mine was bonin my gf in front of the tv
Just met a girl...She is complaining why on facebook you can't have more then one "open relationship"
I dont know how i feel about her from a moral standpoint...
8$ liquor pitchers. I'm gonna wear two or three pairs of underwear so when drunk me takes them off there'll still be a pair on.
i should not be allowed to orgasm that much in one day.
I think you'll appreciae more than anyone that I'm renting my parking spot out for a half gallon of vodka a month.
When you hit the 45 minute mark of any argument about The Flintstones, you have to realize: it's no longer you arguing, it's the cocaine arguing.
These shoes are way too nice for a walk of shame. Its how I keep myself in line.
I accidentally lit my hair on fire and we broke the bed. How was your night?
Btw his name is Woody. I must be really drunk to think this is a good situation
Fuck I forgot the furry convention was this weekend and now I'm downtown. Way too high for this shit.
Can we do lunch at 3? I have a blowjob scheduled for 2.
You schedule blowjobs?
Is there a tactful way to ask "how are your balls?" Or do I just ask point blank
I look over and the both of you are naked, and he's eating chicken nuggets off the floor
Randomize
