love how google fills in search terms for you, today for example, i ran a query for "why do girls get t"
and google finished it w/ "ramp stamps."
I felt less weird knowing others had searched this before me.
trying to fathom saturday night and the fact that Rainn Wilson now hates me. my brain hurts.
It's hipsters with their motorcycle cop mustaches, moccasins, douchey irony, and department stores to supply their independent conformity
Something's gotta give!
he just found out his girl is having a boy. he's probably googling "Ed Hardy diapers" as we speak.
yeah she was being a bitch. do you remember me stealing ryan cabrerra's beer?!?!
I spent all day at the mall with her, then she made me actually watch a walk to remember then decided to tell me she was on her period. This one is either really crafty or I am really desperate.
So can we talk about how we all three made out with the bike taxi driver in lieu of paying him. I'm not even mad, that's resourceful. You know what married girls would have had to do? They'd have had to pay.
Did you bedazzle the elevator?
So the old dude that tried to fight me is definitely Katie's dad. And the pot cookie's kicking in. Shit is getting weird.
What not to say at an interview: i can wrap the shit out of some food.
A big thanks to that bride-to-be, Her fiance and his loaded friends will forever hold a place in my heart for the generous tequila body shots on the couch at Henry's.
I successfully navigated a full, lengthy interaction with my dad in which he never asked me if I was freshly baked. 10 points.
So she said she could really go for a cheeseburger and I remembered I had one in my pocket. No idea where it came from.
Hey do you care to explain why there are 3 empty pickle jars next to me when I woke up or do I even wanna know?
Pandora played an ad for a free trial for an abortion pill if you’ve had unprotected sex in the last 2-3 days and then Lucky came on... I literally am dying laughing
Randomize
