just gave him road head on the way home IN A SNOW STORM..good thing we didn't crash or I'd be dead. I DIDN'T HAVE MY SEATBELT ON
clearly you have your priorities straight
UD be completely fine. you don't lose control just keep a positive environment. for example i really want to lick the wall cause red is delicious but i don't have to.
i got a blow job in the bathroom during intermission at the hockey game. i'm pretty sure i made Canada proud.
So I realized I'm not completely sober when the automatic toilet flushed and I screamed
we've decided to start cutting you off when you can't figure out how to work an ipod.
I vaguely remember having a cowboy explain his belt buckle to me in the bathroom hallway
if memory serves, the guy you were hooking up with said he was a slutty skittle.
Officially crunch time. It's my last year of grad school and I've yet to get blown in a school library. The parking garage was less than a block away though.
You know that feeling when you wake up and your whole body just smells like a penis?
I mixed Jack with hot chocolate. This may be the best or worst idea ever. I have yet to find that out
Well as if this year didn't suck enough already, I can now count 2015 as the year I got chlamydia
Pooping with Eye of the Tiger playing. Not a single fuck shall be given.
I was afraid I was gonna get a URI, so I peed on his front porch.
You ran up a $300 bar bill on his card and he didn't have you arrested, be grateful and move on.
Put my boyfriend in a chastity cage while he was passed out last night. Now I control his orgasms.
Randomize
