Thats not how I planned it, its just the way she passed out
my mother just offered to pay for my fake id.
Ah that type of Dick. I think my phones trying to make me less of a whore by capitalizing Dick. That way it looks like I'm talking about a dude not penis
So, Southern Comfort will donate 25 cents for every bottle sold towards Gulf Coast Relief... Can we save the wetlands through my alcoholism?
They went to the hospital to try backflips in the parking lot. Be ready for the call
He came in my eye, I lost my earring and all of his friends saw me topless. Happy New Year to you as well.
Pre warning. Your not gonna sleep tonight cuz I'm staying with your roommate. Thanks for breaking up with me.
At the bar. Madeline and I totally brought our own pitcher from home because they always run out. Hello alcoholism.
He showed up drunk to my cousions HS grad party, we stayed at the bars till 2, then he got up at 5 to run a half marathon and by the time I woke up wlhe was already back and drinking.
I feel like having peed on eachother is a point in our lives we should never have gotten to...
Solid. Can't put a price on good times
You can and it's called a liver.
I'm mortified. After he finished, he turned to me and said,"So, what did you think of my mom?" WTF Please tell me he was not wondering about that while he was going down on me!!!
i remember going to sleep after the 4th time i threw up this morning and hoping i didn't have to again because then it would be uneven between saturday and sunday. my ocd is getting out of control
His roommates are gone so we had sex in every room of the house and watched the wire. What have you done today?
was i wearing any clothes at that point?
socks and a thong
Randomize