"Monday" is guna come over...
but its Thursday?
yeah, but she cant make it.Monday can...so there ya go
I bet him anal if they won...the one time Detroit decides to win, it had to be this week
So im walking through ohare and this guy walks by with a cart full of big bottles of liquor. I want to know what flight hes on.
martini and pecan pie.. breakfast of champions.
All I can see in the pic you sent is white shorts...
Thas my pasnts in colleg! Tehy glow! AND SMELL LIKE BEER!
I woke up with a piece of pizza duct taped too my hand and a paragraph written on my chest. Good night is say
I forgot that I thought it would be a good idea to hairspray my toilet seat last night after I took 12 shots of vodka so when I just went to pee, I stuck to the toilet. Never drinking again.
We passed my parents while I was giving him road head...that awkward
He took the Gold in Olympic clit licking last night. Canada should be proud.
When they send me to rehab, I'm screaming your name down the halls.
You were naked with a chalice of Skittles vodka, singing along to Les Miserables.
You're dick is like the main character. It needs its own picture.
The only word that describes how much hair I shaved off of my ass is "considerable".
I pretended to be blind and he pretended to be my assistant and long story short, we had to buy that bra and panty set, and now we're both banned from Victoria's Secret AND I have a cum stained demi cup.
Our baby is creepy.
That's how we know it's ours. haha
Randomize
